Why are you fucking people so self-absorbed? Has anyone ever noticed that nobody talks to anybody anymore, they just talk at each other? These damned conversations would be just as fulfilling for both involved if they just used mirrors instead of other people.Now, I'm clearly self-absorbed. I talk about myself all the time. I'm me, though. People want to hear what I am saying, that's the difference. It's also important to note that damnit I don't just go spouting off to whomever is handy, that's bullshit.
I notice this mostly at work, maybe because I'm surrounded by stupid people. Maybe it's just because I'm captive there for 12 hours at a time. I don't talk to most people at work, because I know the ridiculous that will result. I do, however, get bored enough to listen to other people talk. I honestly can't fucking understand how the following exchange can take place:
Random Annoying Coworker #1: "Man I'm so exhausted today."What the fuck? WHAT the FUCK? I don't even understand how grown adults can respond like that. But they do, every fucking time. Nobody is actually listening to anybody else, they're just passively monitoring for keywords they can use for a response about themselves. This is bullshit.
Random Annoying Coworker #2: "Oh, I slept fine last night."
Random Annoying Coworker #1: "Well, I spent all night at the hospital. My wife is dying of cancer and she took a turn for the worse. Things got really bad last night and it was touch-and-go for hours. I think she only has a few more days left in her."
Random Annoying Coworker #2: "I had to go to the hospital once."
You all get points for being versatile, though. Jesus, there is nothing safe from your selfish stupidity:
RAC3: "I'm so excited, I just bought a new car!"My biggest problem with this is: why? Why even talk? Just get back to work and shutup. By get back to work, I of course mean continuing your streak of systematically destroying the precarious Excel files that we all rely on. Stupid, incompetent coworkers. Well, at least I never run out of shit to clean up because of you people.
RAC4: "I was going to buy a new car, and then I thought, no I'm not going to do that."
RAC5: "I hope I can get out of here early today, I have to take my dog to the vet."
RAC6: "Last time I went to the vet I was there forever."
RAC7: "I went to the rodeo this weekend."
Me: "You know what? Fuck off."
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12 comments:
I also like to blog about not talkign to coworkers. Wait, what'd you say?
I told a fitness instructor once that I'd be away for while, to attend my fathers funeral.
She brightly replied. "Okay, Have fun." 'Oblivious Twat', comes to mind.
It must be a massive social disorder in your company. To often respond with me, me, me, typically means me don't get out very often.
Heh. I've caught myself doing the same thing to people. Doh! Oh look! I did it again! At least I know I'm self-absorbed. :P
Oh and on the self-absorbed link you have up there....I tend to agree more with the commenters there...every generation has issues with the youth. After all, Narcissus was in the time of Greek Mythology, so narcissism is nothing new.
I got a 7 minute voicemail from a coworker about her kid's illness last night. I'm one of those people who usually talks at people about my dog's bowel movements when they bring up their kids- but talking at my voicemail was sneaky sneaky.
Your pretentiousasshole humor, it's good times. Reached my "talk about you" quota, now back to me...
That blood pumping organ slightly left of center in my chest also has a special chamber dedicated to shop towels. I'm glad you can understand this. Thanks for your comment by the way... I'm really just getting started on this whole blog-deal.
Ugh, to add to your observation, I hate when it starts turning into a oneupmanship contest. Makes me want to get a mallet and pound them into the ground.
I had a conversation with a friend about this on our lunch break today.
Our personal favourite is the people who ask how you are and don't give a shit.
Co-Worker: Hi Ashley!
Me: Hi! How are you?
C-W: I'm good, how are you?
Me: Oh, I am fi...
C-W has walked away.
Don't ask if you don't care. That should be a rule. No, no. Better rule. Everyone has to be a mute at work. If you speak, you get written up. That would make me happy.
I think my Grandma was ahead of her time when she told me, approximately 40 years ago, "People ask how you are, but they don't really care". Ahhh...the lessons learnt at Gma's knee.
I couldn't agree more! I think they just talk to hear themselves talk (either becaue they're sleepy or they just love to hear their own voices). And do you know what else? I hate it when they roll their chair up to me, ask me questions, and then question why I won't answer them. Isn't it obvious I don't want to talk? "Is everything okay Kim? You usually talk (no I don't). Is everything okay at home?" Are you fracking kidding me? Frack you and your fracking male estrogen hormones. I don't want to talk. Geezuz! Leave me be to read my blogs and save the world.
There is no possible way those can be actual adult conversations. I will sit here in the boondocks and refuse to believe that people are that stupid and shallow.
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